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2002-01-24 - 2:30 p.m. -
day away yesterday.
did a performance poetry workshop at a high school.
for the first time in a long time i did a
high school program & enjoyed it.
the kids were great. eager to listen & learn.
quick to share their work & respond to others.
it was a good day.
then it all fell apart. we have been having a rough time of it lately.
tight on cash. lots of stress. tension in spades.
my wife has been playing guitar, writing songs.
kind of her �free therapy� as it were.
she has spent the past few weeks rehearsing, getting ready
for an open mic she wanted to go to.
we got back from the school & she started playing.
getting ready for last night�s open mic.
she was all excited about going. looking forward to it. then the neck snapped off the guitar. it is an old acoustic. was starting to show it�s age.
but it was just what she did not need.
an hour before she was going to leave & the guitar breaks.
last straw. she snapped.
she tracked down another guitar to use for the night & a friend
of ours (who runs the open mic) lent her another guitar but still
you could see the world drop down on her.
there are times i feel powerless.
so far today is going much better (knock on wood).
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spent a long time on the phone with a friend last night.
she lives on the left coast now & is having
her own life troubles. i miss her to bits.
i just wanted to climb through the phone line & hug her.
she is a good soul who deserves so much more in life.
i want her to find the perfect woman to
dance into the sunset with. i want to give her joy.
i get protective of my friends. i want them to be happy
i hope more for their peace than mine.
i think that�s the way it should be.
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sometimes i wonder what others get from this diary.
i read at least 10 other diaries a day.
i feel somehow comforted by keeping tabs on my friends.
even if i can�t talk to them i know that they are well.
but mine seems so depressing at times.
but i feel like if i write it down that somehow
my load becomes lighter. easer to take.
it�s nice to know i can talk to others when i�m feeling alone.
just knowing that someone is at the other end of all
these zeros & ones is comforting. yeah yeah, i know.
i�ll shut up now.
Thanks :-)
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Today�s Stats
Coffee Count: 6 mugs
Cigarettes: 9
Candy: none
Now Playing: Van Morrison �Moondance�
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�Someday we�ll look back on this moment
and plow into a parked car.�
-bumper sticker
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