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lets start with the basics� back from nationals & dragging. tried to catch up on stuff last night, but my computer has decided to crap out on me. i will spend tonight rebuilding the operating system in hopes of getting it to work. very frustrating. feeling like i have the anti-midis touch� everything i touch goes to shit. trying not to let it upset me too much� in the big picture it is not worth getting bent out of shape over. doing my best not to let the little shit bother me, but the computer did piss me off last night & it took a while to get myself calmed down. i need to relax about things more� it is all part of a learning process & trying to redirect my frustrations so i�m not such a putz. nationals were good for the most part. the team did very well & i was proud as a peacock with them. they did a great job, handled themselves well both in victory & defeat, & presented their work the best i had seen it. i could not have asked for anything more. i spent the week running my ass off & realized on saturday afternoon that i had not done � of what i had wanted to do. this tends to happen at nationals, but this year it really got to me. it is like i keep falling into the same trap & i never learn better. i ended up blowing off most of the finals so i could wander navy pier for a few hours. it was the break i needed & it helped salvage the week for me. it was another part of the learning process for me� learning to take the time for myself & to remember my needs. there are so many things i wish i had done while i was there, but i can�t play the regret game anymore. things happened for a reason (even if i don�t know what the reason is half the time). yeah, i didn�t get my tattoo, but i did get to see fireworks. i didn�t get to most of the bookstores i wanted to go to, but dave got me a wonderful book while he was shopping. i only got to read one poem the whole week, but i got a lot of good complements about my hosting. it is all a balance� it all works out. in the end, i will remember the good things that happened & forget all the bad things. (except for the truck full of explosives� that i won�t forget.) The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance. there is much more i want to talk about, but not right now. i think i�ve prattled on enough for one day. i�ll post more tomorrow (or tonight if i can get my computer to work). hope you all had a good week. be well. |
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